RE: FN-FORUM Just for a laugh

date posted 29th August 2000 22:00

this was just too good to bin! I have so many clients that have given a
brief just like this!

Andrew
-------------------------
ANDREW WILSON PRODUCTIONS
South Lanarkshire, Scotland
tel: 01899 220 300 mobile: 077 85 248 554
visit our website at www.awp.co.uk

> -----Original Message-----
> From: [EMAIL REMOVED]
> [EMAIL REMOVED] Behalf Of Jonathan Irvine
> Sent: 29 August 2000 20:23
> To: [EMAIL REMOVED]
> Subject: Re: FN-FORUM Just for a laugh
>
>
> thanks andrew
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Andrew Wilson
> To: [EMAIL REMOVED]
> Sent: Tuesday, August 29, 2000 7:49 PM
> Subject: RE: FN-FORUM Just for a laugh
>
>
> my pleasure!
>
> Andrew
> -------------------------
> ANDREW WILSON PRODUCTIONS
> South Lanarkshire, Scotland
> tel: 01899 220 300 mobile: 077 85 248 554
> visit our website at www.awp.co.uk
> -----Original Message-----
> From: [EMAIL REMOVED]
> [EMAIL REMOVED] Behalf Of g.steptoe
> Sent: 25 August 2000 12:32
> To: [EMAIL REMOVED]
> Subject: FN-FORUM Just for a laugh
>
>
> IF ARCHITECTS HAD TO WORK LIKE WEB PROGRAMMERS
>
> Dear Mr. Architect:
>
> Please design and build me a house. I am not quite sure of what
> I need, so
> you should use your discretion.
> My house should have somewhere between two and forty-five bedrooms. Just
> make sure the plans are such
> that the bedrooms can be easily added or deleted. When you bring the
> blueprints to me, I will make the final
> decision of what I want. Also, bring me the cost breakdown for each
> configuration so that I can arbitrarily
> pick one.
>
> Keep in mind that the house I ultimately choose must cost less
> than the one
> I am currently living in. Make
> sure, however, that you correct all the deficiencies that exist in my
> current house (the floor of my kitchen
> vibrates when I walk across it, and the walls don't have nearly enough
> insulation in them).
>
> As you design, also keep in mind that I want to keep yearly maintenance
> costs as low as possible. This
> should mean the incorporation of extra-cost features like
> aluminum, vinyl,
> or composite siding. (If you
> choose not to specify aluminum, be prepared to explain your decision in
> detail.)
>
> Please take care that modern design practices and the latest
> materials are
> used in construction of the
> house, as I want it to be a showplace for the most up-to-date ideas and
> methods. Be alerted, however, that
> kitchen should be designed to accommodate, among other things, my 1952
> Gibson refrigerator.
>
> To insure that you are building the correct house for our entire family,
> make certain that you contact each of
> our children, and also our in-laws. My mother-in-law will have
> very strong
> feelings about how the house
> should be designed, since she visits us at least once a year. Make sure
> that you weigh all of these options
> carefully and come to the right decision. I, however, retain the right to
> overrule any choices that you make.
>
> Please don't bother me with small details right now. Your job is
> to develop
> the overall plans for the house:
> get the big picture. At this time, for example, it is not
> appropriate to be
> choosing the color of the carpet.
> However, keep in mind that my wife likes blue.
>
> Also, do not worry at this time about acquiring the resources to
> build the
> house itself. Your first priority is to
> develop detailed plans and specifications. Once I approve these plans,
> however, I would expect the house to
> be under roof within 48 hours.
>
> While you are designing this house specifically for me, keep in mind that
> sooner or later I will have to sell it
> to someone else. It therefore should have appeal to a wide variety of
> potential buyers. Please make sure
> before you finalize the plans that there is a consensus of the population
> in my area that they like the
> features this house has. I advise you to run up and look at my neighbor's
> house he constructed last year.
> We like it a great deal. It has many features that we would also like in
> our new home, particularly the 75-foot
> swimming pool. With careful engineering, I believe that you can
> design this
> into our new house without
> impacting the final cost.
>
> Please prepare a complete set of blueprints. It is not necessary at this
> time to do the real design, since they
> will be used only for construction bids. Be advised, however,
> that you will
> be held accountable for any
> increase of construction costs as a result of later design changes.
>
> You must be thrilled to be working on as an interesting project
> as this! To
> be able to use the latest
> techniques and materials and to be given such freedom in your designs is
> something that can't happen very
> often. Contact me as soon as possible with your complete ideas and plans.
>
> PS: My wife has just told me that she disagrees with many of the
> instructions I've given you in this letter. As
> architect, it is your responsibility to resolve these differences. I have
> tried in the past and have been unable
> to accomplish this. If you can't handle this responsibility, I
> will have to
> find another architect.
>
> PPS: Perhaps what I need is not a house at all, but a travel trailer.
> Please advise me as soon as possible if
> this is the case.
>
>
> I thought this hit the nail on the head, especially with the
> large corporate
> I work for!
>
> Nickki
>
>
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