Re: FN-FORUM Morning =)

date posted 7th September 2002 03:41

Good Morning!

Looks good but...

It splits but is still usable in NS4.7

I think you need to have a look at where you use bold and regular font.
Some of the titles appear regular with the text bold. I'd prefer if the
main text wasn't bold, it looks wrong. Also with the whole lot in bold
the yellow looks like its used as highlighting, which sometime it is and
sometimes its a link, perhaps a slight change on rollover would be good
for the links to make them more obvious.

You also have two links to 'home'

IE looks fine and doesn't appear to have the two 'home' links that both
NS's have. The text links at the bottom also are the wrong font in IE.

I like the design though, sort out the bold text and I think it will
look great.

I think you need to resize the letter its rather large at the moment and
the text would still be readable at half the size (i realise this is
only online but makes it hard to read through.. Its hard to read that
large but i did notice the first line is abit iffy 'take the opportunity
in taking advantage of' sounds weird take the opportunity and take the
advantage mean the same thing your just repeating yourself, choose one
or the other 'take the opportunity of' or 'take advantage of'. Next bit
has three 'ours' in. I would write that sentence as...

'We would like to invite you to take advantage of our introductory
prices on web design packages. These special prices coninside with the
launch of the new Tourism Southwest web design site.'

Thats abit better, if you try reading your sentence aloud you'll
probably see what I mean, lots of repeated words/meanings.

The rest reads abit easier, I don't like the sentence 'This promotion
however...' I'm not sure you need the however in there perhaps put 'The
first 10 customers to sign up will receive...' it sounds abit more positive.

'every website we do..' would read better with a full stop after and
start 'our service doesn't end with the completion of your site' as a
new sentence.

Rather the saying getting on line is a 'good route' I would say how it
can 'benefit' you, it sounds abit more like it will improve their
business rather then just change it. Either put a space between the / or
don't but don't do both.

The sentence about brochures doesn't read write and you should use
'three' instead of '3' republish and update mean the same thing. 'No
more having to re-print brochures/leaflets,simply put your webaddress
on... A website could cost your business upto three time less to update!'

I would also swap the last two sentences around.

Sorry this has turned into a rather long email. My grammar isn't perfect
but I'm sure other people will comment on the letter to and these are
only my suggestions.

Tamsin

Ryan Kirkaldy wrote:

> Morning =)
>
>
>
> first post to this mailing list.
>
>
>
> Was wondering if i could get some opinions on my website, its finished
> ( part from meta tags etc ), also it would be nice to know if its
> working on all browsers, i've checked it on netscape7 and internet
> explorer 6, any previous versions and other browsers you guys might be
> using would be useful to know if its all working 100% =).
>
>
>
> www.tourismsw.co.uk
>
>
>
> I've built up a letter to go with it, this is lowest quality version
> for the net so it isn't too large, ( 500kb aprox ) , full version is
> max quality / print quality.
>
> www.tourismsw.co.uk/lettertswlow.jpg
>
>
>
>
>
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> Any and all opinions welcome on both the letter and the website =).
>
>
>
> Thanks.
>
>
> Regards,
> Ryan Kirkaldy
> Tourism SouthWest - Web Design Specialists
> www.tourismsw.co.uk
> [EMAIL REMOVED] [EMAIL REMOVED]
>